ROH BEST IN THE WORLD

from Lowell, Massachusetts
attendance: 2,500

EL TERRIBLE & ULTIMO GUERRERO vs. THE KINGDOM (11:10): Guerrero is 45 years old...so why does he look like he's a lot older? Like...ten years older. I've been watching CMLL on Friday nights lately so I see him all the time. He's kind of like Hulk Hogan at the end. The crowd pops for him and he entertains but he's older and slower and can't really hang with the young, fast dudes. But he has been doing this so long that he knows what works. The Kingdom are the opposite; young, brash, suicidal idiots. This was mediocre stuff. And if you're gonna fly some wrestlers all the way from Mexico to Massachusetts...why not bring some good ones like Dragon Lee? **

KAZARIAN vs. HANGMAN PAGE "STRAP MATCH" (12:06): They each had a leather strap attached to their wrist. At one point, Page brought out a strap with nails on it...and they both used it! Sick. Page usually wrestles in New Japan. He's actually much more entertaining doing this hardcore-style type of stuff than actual wrestling. This was mildly amusing. **

ALEX SHELLEY, CHRIS SABIN, JAY WHITE & JONATHAN GRESHAM vs. CAPRICE COLEMAN, KENNY KING, RHETT TITUS & SHANE TAYLOR (12:45): The losing team must disband. Really? Are there that many 4-man tag-team matches that this stipulation matters? Shelley and Sabin, the Motor City Machine Guns, are stellar. The rest are a mixed bag. There was a lot of action so it worked. **1/2

JAY LETHAL vs. SILAS YOUNG (16:40): Young is the so-called "Last Real Man." Because he's going bald and has a mustache? Post-match, Young's obese sidekick did a top rope splash down onto Lethal on a table. That was cool. **

DALTON CASTLE & THE BOYS vs. BULLY RAY & THE BRISCOE'S (13:45): Dalton's gimmick might be the zaniest and best in wrestling. His "boys" are natives that undress his coat and pants in the ring and are used as foot stools when he enters. It's so silly and ridiculous that it's awesome. So this was mostly pure comedy. It was somewhat entertaining. **

KUSHIDA vs. MARTY SCURLL (14:54): With these two superstars I figured this would be great. It didn't work. At all. I guess they don't mesh? Kushida kept his TV title here, which was a surprise since he lives and wrestles in Japan (he's wrestling Bushi in the main event on Tuesday in Tokyo for the Jr. Heavyweight title). It just never really heated up to much. And there were way too many submission holds to excite anyone. *1/2

THE YOUNG BUCKS vs. WAR MACHINE vs. BARETTA & CHUCKIE T (12:27): This was the best match on the show. Baretta (where's Romero?) and Chuckie T were a last minute addition. It was a typical Bucks match. Tons of flips, dives, craziness. ***

CODY vs. CHRISTOPHER DANIELS (19:18): A typical, dull Cody match. He won the title here and next weekend is facing Okada for the NJPW title in Long Beach. Not sure why he's getting a global push since he's never been that exciting in the ring to produce anything worth watching. They did a ringside table break which was cool. And Daniel's always does some cool stuff like his Best Moonsault Ever. But this was a poor main event. *1/2

WWE MONEY IN THE BANK

from St. Louis
attendance: 15,932

THE HYPE BROS vs. THE COLONS (8:30): Mojo Rawley, part of the Hype bros tag team with Zack Ryder, seems pretty over. So why is he in this, a forgotten, mediocre pre-show match against a joke team while he's in a joke team? He did win the Andre the Giant Battle Royal at 'Mania this year. And I swear I haven't seen him since until tonight. *1/2

CARMELLA vs. CHARLOTTE vs. NATALYA vs. TAMINA vs. BECKY LYNCH "LADDER MATCH" (13:20): Well this, the first ever women's Money in the Bank ladder match was won by man. There's progress, feminism, modern thinking and (whatever else you want to come up with) right there. Carmella's manager (or whatever he is), James Ellsworth, climbed up and grabbed the briefcase for her. Oh, the controversy! Besides that, this match had only five wrestlers in it but the men's ladder match had six for some reason (depleted roster?). Oh, and this was probably the worst ladder match I've ever seen. No big bumps, no suicide dives, no spectacle. If you want the women to be on the level playing field with men then fucking do it right. Not this tame, short, dull, lifeless thing. Charlotte did a ladder-less top-rope flip twist to ringside which was cool...but this is a ladder match! Use the ladder! * 

THE NEW DAY vs. THE USO'S (12:00): Good, fast paced, competitive match. Bad ending, though, with the tag champ's, the Uso's, leaving and being counted out. **1/2

LANA vs. NAOMI (7:30): Horrible. Just...truly unwatchable. And this was a title match! -No Stars-

JINDER MAHAL vs. RANDY ORTON (20:50): They did the same thing they did last month. Orton put one of the Singh brother's through the announce table with a wicked RKO and then went back into the ring and Jinder hit his forgettable slam finish and kept the title. Honestly? Smackdown's title picture/program sucks. You should be having Nakamura vs. Styles or Owens vs. Zayn for the title. Not a dull amateur and an old, boring dude. **

BREEZANGO vs. THE ASCENSION (3:50): Palette cleanser. I seriously didn't think The Ascension still worked here. 1/2*

BARON CORBIN vs. AJ STYLES vs. KEVIN OWENS vs. SHINSUKE NAKAMURA vs. SAMI ZAYN vs. DOLPH ZIGGLER "LADDER MATCH" (29:45): Good match but it didn't have a lot of carnage or big spots like we used to see. Zayn did a top of the ladder Blue Thunder Bomb on Ziggler which is basically a Hiromu Takahashi jump over and power-bomb maneuver. AJ slammed Owens onto a ladder bridge at ringside. Zayn gave Owens a Dragon Suplex on the edge of the ring. Zayn pushed Owens off the top rope and onto a ladder that was laying down open. Corbin hit Nakamura before the match with a ladder so Nakamura was out for twenty minutes until his big return. They did a cool spot where AJ and Nakamura faced off and pushed the ladder out of the way just to wrestle each other. Corbin, the obvious worst choice, won. And so goes another Smackdown! ppv. Hopefully this stupid split ends soon because last week both RAW and Smackdown scored record low ratings plus John Cena is returning July 4th as a free agent to roam both shows. **1/2

NJPW DOMINION

from Osaka, Japan

DAVID FINLAY, SHOTA UMINO & TOMOYUKI OTA vs. HIRAI KAWATO, KATSYUA KITAMURA & TETSUHIRO YAGI (7:37): This was a pre-show match featuring the rookies, aka The Young Lions. Also David Finlay for some reason. Mildly entertaining but forgettable. **

TIGER MASK, TIGER MASK W, TOGI MAKABE & YUJI NAGATA vs. HIROYOSHI TENZAN, JUSHIN THUNDER LIGER, MANABU  NAKANISHI & SATOSHI KOJIMA (7:01): Tiger Mask W is really one of the best wrestlers on the planet (Kota Ibushi)...so why is he dressing up as an Anime character and only wrestling once in a blue moon? Who the fuck knows. Nagata is 49 years old. Liger is 52. Nakanishi is 50. Why are they still doing this? Alas, these questions are more interesting than this match was. **

LOS IGNOBERNABLES vs. BULLET CLUB vs. CHAOS vs. SUZUKI GUN vs. TAGUCHI JAPAN (18:39): Two teams started this match and the winner moved on and the losers went home until a final champion was crowned. Bushi, Evil, and Sanada retained their 3-man tag title belts. Ricochet was fun to watch. Taichi bored us with his mediocrity. And where was Ospreay? He wasn't even on this show. This was fast paced and fun, albeit for a stupid belt. **1/2

THE YOUNG BUCKS vs. RAPPONGI VICE (14:14): The Bucks won back their Jr. tag titles here in a good match that, sadly, wasn't as entertaining as their usual matches are. They're usually better doing fun, silly, crazy matches like the ROH Hardy Boyz matches from earlier this year or even their match on Friday with Omega vs. Rappongi Vice and Okada. The last couple of years they were constantly in these three or four tag team cluster fuck matches with reDragon and Sydal and Ricochet and everyone complained that they did them too much but, hell, these two team matches aren't as good. Oh, well. **1/2

GUERRILLAS OF DESTINY vs. WAR MACHINE (10:43): The Guerrillas won the tag titles here in an okay match. War Machine are two fat, bearded guys that for some reason the Japanese crowds love (it reminds them of Sumo wrestling? Or they rarely see fat people in Japan?). The Guerillas have gotten better but are still pretty bland. **

CODY vs. MICHAEL ELGIN (11:53): An average bore. Cody is facing Okada for the title in Long Beach next month so that's why he won. Cody is one of the most dull wrestlers on the planet. I think the WWE realized this years ago and that's why they stuck him with the ridiculous, out-there Stardust gimmick. Elgin is in good matches sometimes (at last year's Dominion he tore the house down with Omega in a ladder match) but this just was lifeless. 1/2*

KUSHIDA vs. HIROMU TAKAHASHI (19:12): Good match. It was better than their Wrestle Kingdom match. Takahashi has the coolest move in wrestling but it probably should be outlawed. He runs and jumps over the opponent on the ring apron and power bombs him onto the floor. Well he did this to Kushida and Kushida landed head first right on the back of his skull. If that padding wasn't there his skull probably would have cracked. The story here was that Kushida basically went heel to win. Or at least, to a new level of brutality to get the title. He kicked Takahashi multiple times in the head and the crowd booed. Then he put Takahashi's arm in the Hoverboard Lock and twisted his wrist back in a gruesome display and Takashi quit. This wasn't as good as the Ospreay vs. Kushida match from last week nor the Dragon Lee vs. Takashi match in February. But it was the best match on this show. ***

MINORU SUZUKI vs. HIROOKI GOTO "LUMBERJACK DEATH MATCH" (16:00): I miss Shibata. And I'm not sure why this was a "death" match. Suzuki was in the match of the year three year's ago against AJ Styles but so far this year he's been kind of bland. His Suzuki Gun group is like the NWO when the NWO was old and lame. Suzuki retained the NEVER title. This was nothing special. **

HIROSHI TANAHASHI vs. TETSUYA NAITO (25:56): The final ten minutes were awesome. Tanahashi and Naito had one of the year's best matches at Wrestle Kingdom but this was about half as good. Tanahashi hurt his bicep at the ECW Arena last month and just came back Friday. Usually that injury takes six months to heal. So, yes, he's an idiot for returning so soon. Most of the match had Naito working the injured arm. But the end was high drama and two-counts and it was mesmerizing stuff. **1/2

KENNY OMEGA vs. KAZUCHIKA OKADA (60:00): How would they top their first match, the 47 minute epic that Dave Meltzer gave 6 stars and some said was the greatest match of all time? Do a sixty minute draw! Huh? The problem with the first match was that it started slow. I thought they might try a shorter, faster paced match. No. The last ten minutes of this had both men basically laying on the ground or draped on the ropes dead tired for long stretches. The crowd was a silent tomb when the match ended in a draw (NJPW title matches have a 60 minute time limit for some reason). Both guys did all their spots that they did at Wrestle Kingdom with some tweaks. Omega did his top rope moonsault. Okada did a top rope elbow through Omega on a ringside table. Omega kicked out of the Rainmaker. Omega hit his finisher, the One-Winged Angel, but Okada put his foot on the ropes at the two and a half count. By the end they were delivering big moves but too tired to pin one another. Okada hit a Rainmaker and was crawling over for the pin when the bell rang. This was a good match, great in spots, but way too long. It was not as good as their first match in January. Last year, Okada and Tanahashi wrestled to a 30 minute draw in the G1 tournament. That ending was ecstatic; big moves and near-falls and both guys racing to win. This was the opposite. Both men were too tired to race for the pin. It didn't help that they didn't put a countdown clock on the screen. And the draw was a letdown here, even though last year the Okada/Tanahashi draw didn't feel like a letdown. So now, honestly, what the hell do they do next? An eighty minute match? ***

WWE EXTREME RULES

from Baltimore
attendance: 11,769

KALISTO vs. APOLLO CREWS (9:40): This was the best match on the show...and it was on the frigging pre-show (and a WWE commercial aired halfway through it). Kalisto should be on 205 Live and in the cruiserweight division. It helped here that Crews does a lot of flips and high flying so the two meshed well. I'm going to take a wild guess that Kalisto watched the superb Will Ospreay vs. Kushida Best of the Super Juniors finals match in NJPW on Saturday night because Kalisto did some insane stuff here. He did a flip to the floor after bouncing off the top rope ass first from the corner. I don't even know what the fuck that's called...dangerous? These two were back and forth with leaps and dives and 2 counts and it just made you wonder why they're mired in the WWE's forgotten low-card wasteland. These two would have been stars in the BOTSJ tournament. Here, in Baltimore, they were at least crowd favorites while it lasted. *** (out of ****)

THE MIZ vs. DEAN AMBROSE (20:00): The Miz is a star now thanks to the brand split. He's still not in the main event title picture, probably because no one can fathom a Brock Lesnar vs. Miz match. Having his model/bimbo wife at ringside certainly helped his recent surge because his wrestling ability has never been as good as his mic work. This heated up at the end when The Miz attempted to get Ambrose DQ'd (the stip was that Ambrose could lose the title if he was DQ'd...such an extreme rule). The Miz got Maryse to slap him to get a DQ...then pushed the ref from behind and blamed it on Ambrose. Eventually, Ambrose was distracted and The Miz hit is finisher and won the coveted IC title. This was mostly boring and same-old. *1/2

RICH SWANN & SASHA BANKS vs. ALICIA FOX & NOAM DAR (6:20): The WWE did a mixed tag-team match at 'Mania...so why not another one? Unfortunately, this was too short to ever really turn into much of anything. The women's revolution has apparently died prematurely. 1/2*

ALEXA BLISS vs. BAYLEY "SINGAPORE CANE ON A POLE MATCH" (5:20): Bliss is cute...if you like caked on makeup, giant fake eyelashes that look like praying mantis' legs, and the look of a 17 year old cheerleader. But like any oasis, there isn't anything there besides looks. This was super short for a title match. Bliss pretty much won easily after hitting Bayley with the cane and then tossing her head first into the cane lodged against the turnbuckles. I'm baffled at why there wasn't any drama or near-falls. But, let's be honest; how great can anything on a pole match be? 1/2*

CESARO & SHEAMUS vs. THE HARDY BOYZ "STEEL CAGE MATCH" (15:00): Yawn. The only way to win was for both guys on each team to escape the cage. That meant that this was all people climbing up the cage only to be thwarted. That gets stale. Jeff did a twist/flip off the top of the cage, the lone highlight. Cesaro & Sheamus won the titles. *

NEVILLE vs. AUSTIN ARIES "SUBMISSION MATCH" (17:35): These two are great but have yet to have a great match against one another. This was mostly average stuff. And since when is a submission match extreme? **

SOMOA JOE vs. ROMAN REIGNS vs. FINN BALOR vs. SETH ROLLINS vs. BRAY WYATT "EXTREME RULES MATCH" (29:15): This wasn't very good for twenty minutes. The last ten minutes had a table spot and a broken barricade spot and some high drama that saved it. Joe was the favorite and won by putting Finn in the sleeper hold. So the next RAW ppv has Joe, a heel, vs. Brock Lesnar, a heel, for the title. Huh. That match will probably suck. Joe is past his prime and doesn't have a chance. They're saving Roman vs. Brock for Summerslam. I'd have rather seen a Finn vs. Brock match. But I was glad to see Seth Rollins jumping off the top rope and through Bray Wyatt on the announcer's table. That was the best moment of this not-so-great show. **1/2

WWE BACKLASH

from Rosemont, Illinois

TYE DILLINGER vs. AIDEN ENGLISH (8:20): It was a hell of a good week for pro-wrestling...until this show occurred. New Japan started their Best of the Super Juniors tournament on Wednesday and three matches on the first two shows were excellent (Dragon Lee vs. Takahashi, Ospreay vs. Scurll, and Ospreay vs. Ricochet). NXT Takeover Chicago happened last night in the same building as this show and had, by far, WWE's best match of 2017 when Pete Dunn beat Tyler Bate for the U.K. title. The crowd for the NXT show was also ecstatic. Tonight in the same building the crowd was fairly pedestrian. I guess because this card wasn't all that great? Or...NXT fan's are older, hardcore fans. Either way, this pre-show match was forgettable like the majority of this show. Aiden English's tag team partner quit WWE so English is now stuck jobbing to guys. Dillinger, the "perfect ten," is above average but, still, he's wrestling Aiden English on the pre-show. *

SHINSUKE NAKAMURA vs. DOLPH ZIGGLER (15:50): This was Nakamura's WWE in-ring debut (he wrestled in NXT since March of 2016...coincidentally, his last great match was in March '16 against Zayn). Dolph is just okay, and Nakamura is charismatic and all but this was in no way, shape, or form a classic Nakamura NJPW type of match. Yes, Ziggler isn't Okada, AJ Sytles, or Tanahashi (few are)...but what does it mean? That Nakamura isn't that good? That he was only great in NJPW because of his stellar opponents? I guess time will tell. This was kind of dull. **

THE USO'S vs. BREEZANGO (9:15): I laughed. Tyler Breeze and Fandango are doing a hilarious Fashion Police routine on Smackdown. So, being police, Breeze went undercover during this match and dressed up as a janitor with a mop and then an old lady with a walker...in the ring! While wrestling! The crowd chanted for the mop and then for "grandma!" It was amusing. Fandango also did a very cool, over the top rope back flip maneuver to the floor (is he studying Ospreay's tapes?). So this entertained me. **1/2

SAMI ZAYN vs. BARON CORBIN (14:35): Zayn is awesome, one of the best wrestlers in the WWE. But even he couldn't get Baron out of his boring, zombie-crawl offense. Corbin is supposedly Vince's next big star. Wonder why he sucks and lost here? *1/2

NATALYA, CARMELLA & TAMINA vs. CHARLOTTE, NAOMI & BECKY LYNCH (10:05): Forgettable. Forgotten. They should have done a title match instead, right? Since this was the first Smackdown ppv since February. It was a typical TV melee. *1/2

KEVIN OWENS vs. AJ STYLES (21:10): I thought that this would have been better. AJ has been in great matches so far in his WWE career (against Dolph, Ambrose, Cena, and Reigns). Owens was in some classic matches against Cena...two year's ago. This was good, just not a classic we all expected. The finish had AJ being counted out when he got his foot tangled in the wires on the announce table. Groan. The story during the match was Owens working on AJ's damaged leg. Yawn. Hopefully, the rematch is better. **1/2

LUKE HARPER vs. ERICK ROWAN (9:00): This felt like a half an hour...yet it only went nine minutes. Seriously, who gives a fuck about these two? They're big guys so their moves all seemed brutal and devastating...but the crowd snored. 1/2*

JINDER MAHAL vs. RANDY ORTON (15:45): Was Jinder Mahal even on TV before April? I vaguely remember him. I guess he took Rusev's spot as the #1 heel on Smackdown because Rusev got injured. Or the WWE wants to promote their business in India since Mahal is from India. Mahal is a jobber, though. A total loser who was pushed, surprisingly, to the main event for no good reason and shockingly won the title here in a so-so match. I guess if he had lost he would have been back to the R. Truth pile so a win makes sense. Plus, Randy Orton is been-there-done-that. It would help if Jinder was, like, exciting and a good wrestler. He's not. I can't even remember the moves he did in this match besides some forgettable slams. Mahal has two Indian boys that helped him win. Orton tossed them on their heads on the announce table at one point and it surprised me that they're both not paralyzed. This was a surprise of an ending...so this show had that. It's...er...something. **

WWE PAYBACK

from San Jose, CA

ENZO AMORE & BIG CASS vs. LUKE GALLOWS & KARL ANDERSON (6:35): This was a pre-show match. I'll admit it: I'm sick of these four. Amore and Cass are at least mildly amusing on the mic. Gallows and Anderson are so dull they were even boring in NJPW, which is hard to do. This was short, typical, forgotten. *

MIZ TV with FINN BALOR: Good segment. I liked that this was a "skit" and so the show wasn't just three and a half hours of wrestling. And The Miz is great when he's talking (and Maryse is by his side). This led to a #1 Contenders match on RAW for the IC title (Balor vs. Miz vs. Seth Rollins) that was so much better than any match on this card (Miz won).

CHRIS JERICHO vs. KEVIN OWENS (17:55): Surprise, surprise. Jericho is leaving the WWE to go tour with his band...so he was definitely going to lose. He didn't! He won the U.S. title and is headed to Smackdown for...what? A week or two? This match was better than their Mania match but pretty average. **1/2

AUSTIN ARIES vs. NEVILLE (11:20): Good match, albeit Aries won by DQ when Neville grabbed the ref instead of tapping out. This was a lot better than their Mania match (a trend?) but the non-finish destroyed it's greatness. ***

THE HARDY BOYZ vs. CESARO & SHEAMUS (12:45): Sheamus, who pretty much legit retired Daniel Bryan by having brutally stiff matches with him at the end, kicked Jeff Hardy in the face and Hardy lost a front tooth. After the match, Cesaro and Sheamus turned heel and beat up The Hardy's. This was mostly boring. Where, oh where, is Broken Matt and Brother Nero? *1/2

ALEXA BLISS vs. BAYLEY (11:15): Ugh. Vince loves to see his wrestlers lose and/or be humiliated in their home town. Why? Apparently to get "heel heat," which Dave Meltzer says is hard to get (not that hard...if you write a good script for once). So Bayley lost her title in her home town to the cute, blonde pixie. Considering Bayley isn't that over on the main roster...maybe this was dumb. A so-so match. *1/2

BRAY WYATT vs. RANDY ORTON "HOUSE OF HORRORS" (17:10): We all wondered what a HOH match was. Well it's just a low-class, white-trash, meth den...apparently. Half of this was pre-taped. Orton showed up in a limo to the house at night (the ppv was in California so it was still light out in real life). A tractor crossed the lawn without a driver. Scary! And the door to the house was locked. So...Wyatt made the match. Why'd he lock the door? I thought he wanted the match? It got worse. The house was just a dirty house. One room had hanging baby dolls from the ceiling. The two fake punched each other. Wyatt tossed a refrigerator onto Orton and left. After the Rollins/Joe match, these two came to the ring and continued to wrestle and Wyatt won. But this wasn't for Orton's title. And as silly and non-scary as this was (a house of horrors should have spiders, blood, bats, snakes...something frightening, right?), at least it entertained me. It was so stupid it was funny. And it now goes into lore alongside the Kennel from Hell match and other atrocities. **

SETH ROLLINS vs. SAMOA JOE (15:55): These two, for whatever reason, just aren't as entertaining as they once were. Joe is too old I guess. And the match was basic. *1/2

BRAUN STROWMAN vs. ROMAN REIGNS (11:50): This was boring. Strowman tipped over an ambulance with Reigns in it two weeks ago on RAW but Reigns was still here and alive. His shoulder was taped up and so that's why he lost...he wasn't 100%. Strowman is big but dull. Reigns is only in good matches when wrestling someone awesome like AJ Styles. After the match, they were putting Reigns in another ambulance but Reigns thwarted Strowman and tossed him into the ambulance door then slammed it on him. This all leads to Brock Lesnar vs. Strowman for the Universal title...in July. Fuck. This show was in
April. *1/2

WWE WRESTLEMANIA XXXIII

From The Citrus Bowl in Orlando, FL

When the final list of matches for this show was announced, a lot of fans noted that it was gonna be a long night. Which means we shouldn't have been surprised that this was the longest Wrestlemania in history and perhaps the longest pro-wrestling show in the U.S. ever. It didn't matter that we figured it'd go long...but this fucking long? The first match on the pre-show started around 5:45 PM and the whole show ended at 12:13 AM. That's right. 6 1/2 hours long. Perhaps Wrestlemania will just turn into the Oscars, always going long and pissing off everyone and never changing, or maybe they'll cut things next year and wake up. They could make it a two-night event. Hell, this show could've been broken up into four nights. Alas, this show had it's moments. It was entertaining but just way too long.

Pre-Show:

NEVILLE vs. AUSTIN ARIES (15:40): Neville retained the title here in a so-so match. Jack Gallagher actually had a much better match last month at Fastlane. Perhaps Aries is too old these days or these two don't mesh or the tepid crowd response didn't help. Aries did land on his head in one gruesome moment when Neville German suplexed him. Neville raked Aries' eyes to cheat and to win. ** (out of ****)

THE ANDRE THE GIANT MEMORIAL BATTLE ROYAL (MOJO RAWLEY) (14:07): The major story wasn't that Major won (who?), it was that the New England Patriots' Rob Gronkowski jumped out of the crowd to help him win. The big fat Irish dude from NXT, Killain Dain, was also one of the stars. The Big Show and Braun Strauman got eliminated early. It was entertaining. **1/2

DEAN AMBROSE vs. BARON CORBIN (10:55): Ugh. These two had a great hardcore match on Smackdown two days after Wrestlemania where tables were smashed and chairs were used. This was just two dudes wrestling with a dead crowd waiting for the real show to start. *

Main Card:

AJ STYLES vs. SHANE McMAHON (20:35): Good match. Shane did his usual stuff (top rope elbow drop through the announce table, a post to post Van Terminator trashcan spot) but no high altitude suicide drop. Shane did a Shooting Star press and landed on his knees instead of flat. AJ is great and all and the match was good but, c'mon, the best wrestler in the world should be in a long, title match against a top-notch opponent on the biggest show of the year. ***

KEVIN OWENS vs. CHRIS JERICHO (16:20): This was actually pretty forgettable. Jericho is funny on the mic but not exactly a spring chicken in the ring. Owens did all of his patented spots and won. It was average. **

BAYLEY vs. SASHA BANKS vs. CHARLOTTE vs. NIA JAX (12:08): Good match, but a 1 on 1 longer, epic title battle would have been  better. They teamed up to eliminate Nia first. Banks was eliminated next and Bayley pinned Charlotte to keep the title. The highlight was Charlotte doing a top rope moonsault/twist to the floor. **1/2

THE HARDY BOYZ vs. LUKE GALLOWS & KARL ANDERSON vs. CESARO & SHEAMUS vs. ENZO AMORE & BIG CASS "LADDER MATCH" (11:05): The loudest the crowd got all night was when The New Day came out and announced that this match would now be a Fatal Four Way and the new team in it would be...The Hardy Boyz! The place went berserk. The Hardy Boyz were in a ladder match on Saturday night in ROH against The Young Bucks...so, yes, it was a surprise that they were here. And this turned out to be the match of the night. It wasn't one of the best ladder matches ever or anything, but the crowd went nuts and Jeff Hardy did a Swanton off the Big Dog ladder at ringside onto Sheamus and Cesaro laid out on two ladder bridges. It was a fucking spectacle. ***

NIKKI BELLA & JOHN CENA vs. THE MIZ & MARYSE (9:40): Short, average match. But after the match, Cena proposed to Nikki and she said yes and it was a cool moment. She should have said no, kicked him the balls and went and made out with The Miz...but Vince Russo isn't writing this shit anymore. **

SETH ROLLINS vs. HHH (25:30): This was the longest match on the show...and the crowd yawned. Rollins did do some cool top rope jumps even though his knee was supposed to be injured. Stephanie went through a table at ringside when Seth shoved HHH and HHH knocked her off the apron. That got a big pop. But most of this was pretty dull. **

BRAY WYATT vs. RANDY ORTON (10:30): They had an awesome set with a big Earth globe and a rollercoaster and a walkway down to the ring that was also a video screen. When Orton walked down to the ring a viper snake followed him down on the screen. That was neat. And three times during the match a video projection filled up the ring with bugs and worms and things for no real good reason. I guess Wyatt is friends with the guys in the production truck? Orton won the title here with an RKO out of nowhere. There really was no drama or build. This was short, it was late, who cares? Wyatt just won the title at the last Smackdown PPV. What a title reign! *1/2

BROCK LESNAR vs. GOLDBERG (4:45): Good match. As good as it could be, really. Goldberg took bumps! Ten German suplexes! Lesnar kicked out of the Jackhammer. Goldberg also speared Lesnar through the guardrail at ringside. All big moves, all action. And Lesnar won the Universal title. ***

NAOMI vs. ALEXA BLISS vs. CARMELLA vs. MICKIE JAMES vs. NATALYA vs. BECKY LYNCH (5:35): Someone complained that the Smackdown Women's Title shouldn't be defended on the pre-show so they moved it to the dead spot. Nice. This was very short and chaotic and a mess and just okay. Naomi, who's from Orlando, won the title. *1/2

THE UNDERTAKER vs. ROMAN REIGNS (23:05): The worst match on the show was saved for last! Reigns won in a botch-filled, ugly match. 'Taker did get speared and slammed through the announce table. That was the one entertaining moment. 'Taker is too old so it's good that he retired. After he lost he laid his jacket, gloves, and hat in the ring and left. They kicked out of everything of course but this was just awful. The retirement thing was a good "big" ending but at this point, past midnight, we all just wanted to either go home or go to bed. *