WCW’s SOULED OUT

from Cincinatti, Ohio

    There is an epic story to tell about Dubbya-See-Dubbya, but I’ll try to compact it as short as possible. Vince Russo was named the head booker of WCW, the so-called ‘Creative Director’ back in October. As of Friday, January 14th, Russo was demoted from the rank and Kevin ‘Taskmaster’ Sullivan was put in charge as the head booker. Russo was offered a writing job, but as of now he may just take his contract money and leave. Because a lot of wrestlers hate Sullivan. Chris Benoit, Dean Malenko, Konnan, Shane Douglas, Saturn, Rey Mysterio Jr., and Eddie Guerrero all wanted to leave the company. WCW offered them an out on their contracts effective Feb. 1st. Right now neither man has officially taken their release, though the bottom line is that WCW is in turmoil. Yes, I enjoyed Vince Russo’s Crash-TV style which is too focused on backstage antics instead of actual wrestling, but it was getting old fast, and Starrcade absolutely sucked…which supposedly showcased his true booking style. Nitro and Thunder were pretty good and Souled Out was okay, but I think it’s a relief to get away from Russo’s Crash-TV. He had some entertaining ideas and I think he deserved at least three more months as Creative Director, but he’s gone and he probably ain’t coming back.
    And can you believe that throughout all of this chaos, they had a ppv to put on? Add this to the fact that Jeff Jarrett and Bret Hart were respectively to be in 4 ppv matches and they were injured. Did I mention The Wall faced Kidman in a Hell in the Cell match? Okay, so it was pretty interesting to say the least.

+KIDMAN vs. DEAN MALENKO: To lose this match you have to be thrown out of the ring and touch the ground. Well Dean Malenko apparently forget these rules and slipped under the ropes for a breather and it was called a win for Kidman. In my humbly sober oppinion, Malenko did this to piss of management because he’s one of the elusive seven that want to leave WCW. This match was about two minutes long and it gets a goose egg. -0 stars-

VAMPIRO vs. CROWBAR vs. DAVID FLAIR: One of the first things WCW did was to strip Flair and Crowbar of the tag titles. This was a three way dance and pretty wild. Crowbar (who was previously known as Devon Storm on Saturday Night) is a high flying maniac, and he’s extremely entertaining. Vampiro is a decent wrestler, and at David Flair is funny. **1/2

HARRIS BOYS vs. THE MAMALUCS (JOHNNY THE BULL & BIG VITO): Kevin Sullivan and the new booking team are now calling the new tag team of Bull & Vito…The Mamalucs. I like these guys. They were known as ‘Da Baldies’ in ECW only four months ago, and Vito has a killer tornado ddt finisher that’s wild. I like these new tag champs. This match was pretty lame, because the Harris Boys aren’t even the Harris Boys anymore. They back to being suit dressing bodyguards.

OKLAHOMA vs. MADUSA: Why Madusa is even in WCW anymore is beyond me. At least Russo gave her a few plotlines, even though this one is a Jeff Jarrett rip-off from his days in Stamford. Nothing special. *

NORMAL SMILEY vs. BRIAN KNOBBS vs. FIT FINLAY vs. MENG: A sub-par hardcore bout, mostly because it wasn’t really hardcore and Smiley was a helluva lot funnier on Thunder when he dismantled Three Count and said he breathed, “Hardcore air,” and ate, “Hardcore food.” **

+KIDMAN vs. SATURN: The original plan was for Benoit to face JJ in three matches. Benoit got elevated to the title match because JJ and Bret Hart were injured. They stuck Kidman in this triple threat theater. This was the best of the three, with Kidman taking a decent bump over the top rope through a table. Kidman is the only ‘filthy animal’ to definitely agree to stay with WCW. Smart move. He’s almost guaranteed another Cruiserweight reign. **

+BOOKER T. vs. STEVIE RAY: This brother vs. brother match was boring. A big brick shithouse black man known as Big T. came in at the end to help Stevie Ray. Russo really pumped up this Midnight-Harlem Heat plot even though it completely sucked. I’ve never liked HH and am never going to start. *

+TANK ABBOT vs. JERRY FLYNN: One of the funnier aspects about the demotion of Russo was his ideas about this ppv. He conceived an idea to have all the winners of the ppv fight in a battle royal which would be a main event. Whomever won would get the title. Well his original idea was for Tank Abbot to win the title on a fluke. Because of this idea some say Russo was fired because he got into a fight with one of the WCW exectuvies that he was the Creative Director and he could do ‘whatever he wanted’. One punch and Flynn was out. Remember how Russo pumped up ‘The Block’ with Jerry Flynn? Proof that everything Russo touched did not turn to gold. *1/2

+BUFF BAGWELL vs. DDP: I know it sounds corny and stupid, but DDP does deliver the goods at the ppv’s and always pushes the limit. On Nitro and Thunder he’s just okay, but on the ppv’s he always exerts himself and pulls out no stops. Remember his strap match with Ric Flair at Halloween Havoc? That almost stole the show. This was a Last Man Standing Match. Buff put DDP through the internet table and DDP smashed Buff’s face with a computer. Great match. ***

KIDMAN vs. THE WALL: Russo stole a lot of things from the WWF, and his final steal was the awesome ‘Hell in the Cell’ matchup. Basically it’s a cage with a roof that covers the ring and the apron. In WCW they call it the ‘Caged Heat’ matchup, but I’ll still refer to it as a HITC. Shaun Michaels vs. The Undertaker was the first ever HITC match. The second made history when Mankind almost got himself killed when he lost to the ‘Taker. Of course this year we had the third HITC matchup with Bossman being hung against the ‘Taker. Kidman vs. The Wall was horrible. If you have the whole fucking cage there you might as well walk across it or fall off it climbing up. This was disappointment, though I seriously doubted anyone would take a major bump anyway. The Wall wins…what??? *1/2

+NASH vs. TERRY FUNK: Funk is the hardcore king. I knew when he became the commissioner that if only one good thing comes out of it, he’ll at least have one good match while he’s in WCW. This match was short and tooooo sweet. Funk got hit over the head with a few chair shots, got powerbombed through the announce table, and then got powerbombed over three chairs in the ring while bleeding like a stuck pig. He bled so much that WCW actually filmed the match from further away than they had been all night just because it was TV-PG and they couldn’t have any closeups. Funk is 54 years old and takes more bumps that 99.9% of any wrestler out there. He’ll live on as a king. This might be his last reign, but I’m sure he’ll show up down the road. ***

CHRIS BENOIT vs. SID: Benoit won, but it was revealed on Thunder and Nitro that Sid’s foot was under the ropes so Benoit didn’t win. Technically, Benoit is leaving the company so it was impossible for him to keep the title. On Thunder it was put into stone that Sid will face Nash on next week’s Nitro. Of course Sid has to beat JJ first. Reminds me of how Goldberg had to beat Scott Hall before he could face Hogan for the belt? If I do remember correctly, Goldberg beat both of ‘em and won the title. I guran-damn-tee that Sid is your new WCW World Heavyweight Champion come next Monday. As for this match, it was marginal, but Sid can only do one thing in a match that’s exciting and that’s powerbomb you, though at Halloween Havoc he bled like a stuck boar and showed a different side of himself. Who knows. **

    Nitro and Thunder were good shows, which proves that Kevin Sullivan as the head booker isn’t hurting anybody. If Benoit, Malenko, Saturn, Doulgas, Konnan, Guerro, and Mysterio leave, that in all honestly I could give a fuck and WCW will still carry on. I liked Mysterio with a mask on but now he literally blows. I like Shane Douglas but he’s hurt and hasn’t wrestled in months. Benoit is old and I’m sick of him. He has no personality. Good riddance. WCW needs to cut corners, and getting rid of these lame wrestlers is okay by me. Sid as the champ? Sullivan as booker? I can live with that.
    Souled Out 2000 gets ** because it had three good matches (DDP/Buff, Funk/Nash, Crowbar/Vampiro/Flair) and entertained. I predicted 7 out of 12 matches which is 58.3%, an F. Only surprise was The Wall really. Next up is Superbrawl X…or as they’re calling it…Superbrawl 2000. It’ll be Sid verse someone, and by that time Goldberg, Sting, Ric Flair, and Hogan should be back, so it’ll probably be Sid vs. Sting or Sid vs. Goldberg. In three days is WWF’s annual Royal Rumble from the prestigious Madison Square Garden. Cactus Jack vs. Triple H, Chyna vs. Jericho vs. Holly, Dudley’s vs. Hardy’s Table Match, a four way women’s battle royal, and of course the 30-man rumble. It has an excellent card, and with my luck Tazz, Undertaker, and Vince McMahon will show up. Until then.