From The Citrus Bowl in Orlando, FL
When the final list of matches for this show was announced, a lot of fans noted that it was gonna be a long night. Which means we shouldn't have been surprised that this was the longest Wrestlemania in history and perhaps the longest pro-wrestling show in the U.S. ever. It didn't matter that we figured it'd go long...but this fucking long? The first match on the pre-show started around 5:45 PM and the whole show ended at 12:13 AM. That's right. 6 1/2 hours long. Perhaps Wrestlemania will just turn into the Oscars, always going long and pissing off everyone and never changing, or maybe they'll cut things next year and wake up. They could make it a two-night event. Hell, this show could've been broken up into four nights. Alas, this show had it's moments. It was entertaining but just way too long.
Pre-Show:
NEVILLE vs. AUSTIN ARIES (15:40): Neville retained the title here in a so-so match. Jack Gallagher actually had a much better match last month at Fastlane. Perhaps Aries is too old these days or these two don't mesh or the tepid crowd response didn't help. Aries did land on his head in one gruesome moment when Neville German suplexed him. Neville raked Aries' eyes to cheat and to win. ** (out of ****)
THE ANDRE THE GIANT MEMORIAL BATTLE ROYAL (MOJO RAWLEY) (14:07): The major story wasn't that Major won (who?), it was that the New England Patriots' Rob Gronkowski jumped out of the crowd to help him win. The big fat Irish dude from NXT, Killain Dain, was also one of the stars. The Big Show and Braun Strauman got eliminated early. It was entertaining. **1/2
DEAN AMBROSE vs. BARON CORBIN (10:55): Ugh. These two had a great hardcore match on Smackdown two days after Wrestlemania where tables were smashed and chairs were used. This was just two dudes wrestling with a dead crowd waiting for the real show to start. *
Main Card:
AJ STYLES vs. SHANE McMAHON (20:35): Good match. Shane did his usual stuff (top rope elbow drop through the announce table, a post to post Van Terminator trashcan spot) but no high altitude suicide drop. Shane did a Shooting Star press and landed on his knees instead of flat. AJ is great and all and the match was good but, c'mon, the best wrestler in the world should be in a long, title match against a top-notch opponent on the biggest show of the year. ***
KEVIN OWENS vs. CHRIS JERICHO (16:20): This was actually pretty forgettable. Jericho is funny on the mic but not exactly a spring chicken in the ring. Owens did all of his patented spots and won. It was average. **
BAYLEY vs. SASHA BANKS vs. CHARLOTTE vs. NIA JAX (12:08): Good match, but a 1 on 1 longer, epic title battle would have been better. They teamed up to eliminate Nia first. Banks was eliminated next and Bayley pinned Charlotte to keep the title. The highlight was Charlotte doing a top rope moonsault/twist to the floor. **1/2
THE HARDY BOYZ vs. LUKE GALLOWS & KARL ANDERSON vs. CESARO & SHEAMUS vs. ENZO AMORE & BIG CASS "LADDER MATCH" (11:05): The loudest the crowd got all night was when The New Day came out and announced that this match would now be a Fatal Four Way and the new team in it would be...The Hardy Boyz! The place went berserk. The Hardy Boyz were in a ladder match on Saturday night in ROH against The Young Bucks...so, yes, it was a surprise that they were here. And this turned out to be the match of the night. It wasn't one of the best ladder matches ever or anything, but the crowd went nuts and Jeff Hardy did a Swanton off the Big Dog ladder at ringside onto Sheamus and Cesaro laid out on two ladder bridges. It was a fucking spectacle. ***
NIKKI BELLA & JOHN CENA vs. THE MIZ & MARYSE (9:40): Short, average match. But after the match, Cena proposed to Nikki and she said yes and it was a cool moment. She should have said no, kicked him the balls and went and made out with The Miz...but Vince Russo isn't writing this shit anymore. **
SETH ROLLINS vs. HHH (25:30): This was the longest match on the show...and the crowd yawned. Rollins did do some cool top rope jumps even though his knee was supposed to be injured. Stephanie went through a table at ringside when Seth shoved HHH and HHH knocked her off the apron. That got a big pop. But most of this was pretty dull. **
BRAY WYATT vs. RANDY ORTON (10:30): They had an awesome set with a big Earth globe and a rollercoaster and a walkway down to the ring that was also a video screen. When Orton walked down to the ring a viper snake followed him down on the screen. That was neat. And three times during the match a video projection filled up the ring with bugs and worms and things for no real good reason. I guess Wyatt is friends with the guys in the production truck? Orton won the title here with an RKO out of nowhere. There really was no drama or build. This was short, it was late, who cares? Wyatt just won the title at the last Smackdown PPV. What a title reign! *1/2
BROCK LESNAR vs. GOLDBERG (4:45): Good match. As good as it could be, really. Goldberg took bumps! Ten German suplexes! Lesnar kicked out of the Jackhammer. Goldberg also speared Lesnar through the guardrail at ringside. All big moves, all action. And Lesnar won the Universal title. ***
NAOMI vs. ALEXA BLISS vs. CARMELLA vs. MICKIE JAMES vs. NATALYA vs. BECKY LYNCH (5:35): Someone complained that the Smackdown Women's Title shouldn't be defended on the pre-show so they moved it to the dead spot. Nice. This was very short and chaotic and a mess and just okay. Naomi, who's from Orlando, won the title. *1/2
THE UNDERTAKER vs. ROMAN REIGNS (23:05): The worst match on the show was saved for last! Reigns won in a botch-filled, ugly match. 'Taker did get speared and slammed through the announce table. That was the one entertaining moment. 'Taker is too old so it's good that he retired. After he lost he laid his jacket, gloves, and hat in the ring and left. They kicked out of everything of course but this was just awful. The retirement thing was a good "big" ending but at this point, past midnight, we all just wanted to either go home or go to bed. *
Sunday, April 2, 2017
Monday, March 6, 2017
WWE FAST LANE
from Milwaukee
RICH SWANN & AKIRA TOZAWA vs. BRIAN KENDRICK & NOAM DAR (9:25): A pre-show match. There was one moment when Swann flipped over the top rope to the floor and Tozawa jumped through the ropes to the floor simultaneously that was great. Unfortunately, that was it. *1/2 (out of ****)
SOMOA JOE vs. SAMI ZAYN (9:45): Maybe it's because Joe is past his prime (he hasn't been in a really good match in NXT or in the WWE) or maybe it's because this was a one-sided, beat down bore. But this was an awful match. Zayn is awesome when let loose (his match a year ago against Nakamura made my Top 10 Best Matches of the year list). But lately he's been a punching bag. On the first NXT WWE Network special, Cesaro and Zayn had a fantastic match. But look at what they're doing with Cesaro and Zayn now, a few years later. They're completely wasting two of the most talented wrestlers on the roster. It's just sad. Can you imagine how awesome a Joe vs. Zayn match would be today in PWG or ROH? Keep dreaming. -No Stars-
LUKE GALLOWS & KARL ANDERSON vs. ENZO AMORE & BIG CASS (8:40): Gallows and Anderson retained the tag titles in this duller than dull match. This show had a ton of matches under ten minutes yet still didn't end until 11:05 PM. Yawn. 1/2*
SASHA BANKS vs. NIA JAX (8:15): Banks won with a pseudo-small package. It looked like Banks was supposed to hold the ropes to cheat to win but she couldn't reach them. Everyone does say that Banks was better as a heel in NXT. This was forgettable. 1/2*
CESARO vs. JINDER MAHAL (8:20): An un-announced match. Yay! This was basic. The crowd was a silent tomb. 1/2*
THE BIG SHOW vs. RUSEV (8:45): Show punched Rusev in the face while Rusev was sitting down against the ropes in the corner which led to the pin. This was another un-announced match. Also, Rusev got a haircut and it was perhaps the most memorable thing here. *
NEVILLE vs. JACK GALLAGHER (12:10): Good match and by far the match of the night. After Honma in NJPW was injured on Friday taking a botched DDT, seeing all of these brutal landing-on-their-head moments was sickening. Maybe get a coach to show these guys how to be a little more safe? It was dramatic and entertaining, though. This was the best cruiser weight match the WWE's had all year. ***
ROMAN REIGNS vs. BRAUN STROWMAN (17:20): It wasn't awful, which I guess is a compliment. Strowman was pinned for the first time. Reigns was put through a ring side announce table. After Strowman missed a top-rope splash, Reigns speared him for the win. **
BAYLEY vs. CHARLOTTE (16:55): Botch City. These two were a mess tonight, particularly Bayley. This was the surprise of the night, as everyone figured Charlotte would win the continue her PPV win streak. Sasha Banks interfered but the ref didn't care. **
GOLDBERG vs. KEVIN OWENS (0:22): Owens stalled at ringside. When he finally entered, Jericho's music hit and Jericho came out. Owens was shocked. So Goldberg speared and Jack Hammered Owens and won the title. Yes, a 49 year old part timer who just came out of a ten year retirement is the WWE champion and headlining Wrestlemania. Groan. *
RICH SWANN & AKIRA TOZAWA vs. BRIAN KENDRICK & NOAM DAR (9:25): A pre-show match. There was one moment when Swann flipped over the top rope to the floor and Tozawa jumped through the ropes to the floor simultaneously that was great. Unfortunately, that was it. *1/2 (out of ****)
SOMOA JOE vs. SAMI ZAYN (9:45): Maybe it's because Joe is past his prime (he hasn't been in a really good match in NXT or in the WWE) or maybe it's because this was a one-sided, beat down bore. But this was an awful match. Zayn is awesome when let loose (his match a year ago against Nakamura made my Top 10 Best Matches of the year list). But lately he's been a punching bag. On the first NXT WWE Network special, Cesaro and Zayn had a fantastic match. But look at what they're doing with Cesaro and Zayn now, a few years later. They're completely wasting two of the most talented wrestlers on the roster. It's just sad. Can you imagine how awesome a Joe vs. Zayn match would be today in PWG or ROH? Keep dreaming. -No Stars-
LUKE GALLOWS & KARL ANDERSON vs. ENZO AMORE & BIG CASS (8:40): Gallows and Anderson retained the tag titles in this duller than dull match. This show had a ton of matches under ten minutes yet still didn't end until 11:05 PM. Yawn. 1/2*
SASHA BANKS vs. NIA JAX (8:15): Banks won with a pseudo-small package. It looked like Banks was supposed to hold the ropes to cheat to win but she couldn't reach them. Everyone does say that Banks was better as a heel in NXT. This was forgettable. 1/2*
CESARO vs. JINDER MAHAL (8:20): An un-announced match. Yay! This was basic. The crowd was a silent tomb. 1/2*
THE BIG SHOW vs. RUSEV (8:45): Show punched Rusev in the face while Rusev was sitting down against the ropes in the corner which led to the pin. This was another un-announced match. Also, Rusev got a haircut and it was perhaps the most memorable thing here. *
NEVILLE vs. JACK GALLAGHER (12:10): Good match and by far the match of the night. After Honma in NJPW was injured on Friday taking a botched DDT, seeing all of these brutal landing-on-their-head moments was sickening. Maybe get a coach to show these guys how to be a little more safe? It was dramatic and entertaining, though. This was the best cruiser weight match the WWE's had all year. ***
ROMAN REIGNS vs. BRAUN STROWMAN (17:20): It wasn't awful, which I guess is a compliment. Strowman was pinned for the first time. Reigns was put through a ring side announce table. After Strowman missed a top-rope splash, Reigns speared him for the win. **
BAYLEY vs. CHARLOTTE (16:55): Botch City. These two were a mess tonight, particularly Bayley. This was the surprise of the night, as everyone figured Charlotte would win the continue her PPV win streak. Sasha Banks interfered but the ref didn't care. **
GOLDBERG vs. KEVIN OWENS (0:22): Owens stalled at ringside. When he finally entered, Jericho's music hit and Jericho came out. Owens was shocked. So Goldberg speared and Jack Hammered Owens and won the title. Yes, a 49 year old part timer who just came out of a ten year retirement is the WWE champion and headlining Wrestlemania. Groan. *
Sunday, February 12, 2017
WWE ELIMINATION CHAMBER
Phoenix, Arizona
MOJO RAWLEY vs. CURT HAWKINS (8:05): Who are these two? One of them is Zack Ryder's tag team partner. So that makes the other one...? This was a pre-show match. And I was mostly watching the Grammy's while watching this. -No Stars-
BECKY LYNCH vs. MICKIE JAMES (11:40): So Smackdown doesn't have a large roster (one reason that The Miz is suddenly a big star), and six top guys were in the main event, which meant this show had three women's matches. Now I like women's matches if they're good, but let's face it: 90% of all women's matches suck (usually the one's not involving Charlotte, Bayley, or Sasha against each other...and they're all on RAW). And all three on this show were awful. I should also admit, besides watching the Grammy's while watching this show, that yesterday, New Japan had a big show yesterday. So, really, try watching anything after Dragon Lee vs. Hiromu Takahashi and it'll look like paint drying. 1/2*
KALISTO & APOLLO CREWS vs. DOLPH ZIGGLER (7:20): Ziggler is a heel now. So why is the heel facing two men? Isn't that a baby face position? Logic! Does the WWE care? Eh. Crews looks like Bobby Lashley. Kalisto should be on 205Live. And this was dull. *
AMERICAN ALPHA vs. THE ASCENSION vs. THE USO'S vs. HEATH SLATER & RHYNO vs. THE VAUDEVILLAINS vs. BREEZANGO (21:10): Jesus. Look at this shit. This is the tag team division? I guess AA are decent. Their match against The Revival at that NXT: Takeover last year was great. So why are they not great now? This was a tag-team turmoil match. Meaning two teams started and the winner went on to face another team and so on. AA beat The Ascension at the end to keep their titles. This was average. **
NIKKI BELLA vs. NATALYA (13:40): A no-contest. Some nice brawling. They should have gave Nikki the win since she's in a big Wrestlemania match teaming with her real life boyfriend, John Cena, against The Miz and Maryse. I guess they wanted to continue this boring feud. *1/2
RANDY ORTON vs. LUKE HARPER (17:15): Harper broke free from The Wyatt Family again. Remember he did that a few year's ago? I guess the writer's are out of ideas. Or...out of good ideas. Why is Orton in the Wyatt family? Remember when Daniel Bryan joined the Wyatt family? That was pointless. I don't think they realize that joining or leaving that family isn't compelling. Do they think it's like when people joined or left the NWO and the Wolfpac? An entertaining shocker! Well it's not. It's just a lifeless, tired plot. And this match was a stale TV match. Yawn. *1/2
ALEXA BLISS vs. NAOMI (8:20): Bliss is hot. End positive attributes. I mean...she can't wrestle. And wasn't Naomi a back-up dancer to that fat wrestler when she started? I totally forget his name but he's in TNA now. Well Naomi is the champ now. Did I mention Will Ospreay's performance against Shibata yesterday? Why am I not reviewing that show? 1/2*
BRAY WYATT vs. JOHN CENA vs. AJ STYLES vs. THE MIZ vs. DEAN AMBROSE vs. BARON CORBIN "ELIMINATION CHAMBER" (34:20) So Wyatt is finally champion. Took long enough. Although I'm not complaining. The only good match he's ever been in was that Royal Rumble match against Daniel Bryan two year's ago. Right? Wyatt is not known for good matches. He's not bad, he's just fat and slow and not that exciting. His cult-leader gimmick is his saving grace. And he pinned AJ Styles to win here. Cena lost the title he had just won two week's ago. The chamber was new. They made it higher so the wrestler's can stand and fight on top of the pods. Also the chain floor on the sides was replaced with boards. This was a good match but nothing special. If you want something special, go watch the last fifteen minutes of that Naito/Elgin match.
**1/2
MOJO RAWLEY vs. CURT HAWKINS (8:05): Who are these two? One of them is Zack Ryder's tag team partner. So that makes the other one...? This was a pre-show match. And I was mostly watching the Grammy's while watching this. -No Stars-
BECKY LYNCH vs. MICKIE JAMES (11:40): So Smackdown doesn't have a large roster (one reason that The Miz is suddenly a big star), and six top guys were in the main event, which meant this show had three women's matches. Now I like women's matches if they're good, but let's face it: 90% of all women's matches suck (usually the one's not involving Charlotte, Bayley, or Sasha against each other...and they're all on RAW). And all three on this show were awful. I should also admit, besides watching the Grammy's while watching this show, that yesterday, New Japan had a big show yesterday. So, really, try watching anything after Dragon Lee vs. Hiromu Takahashi and it'll look like paint drying. 1/2*
KALISTO & APOLLO CREWS vs. DOLPH ZIGGLER (7:20): Ziggler is a heel now. So why is the heel facing two men? Isn't that a baby face position? Logic! Does the WWE care? Eh. Crews looks like Bobby Lashley. Kalisto should be on 205Live. And this was dull. *
AMERICAN ALPHA vs. THE ASCENSION vs. THE USO'S vs. HEATH SLATER & RHYNO vs. THE VAUDEVILLAINS vs. BREEZANGO (21:10): Jesus. Look at this shit. This is the tag team division? I guess AA are decent. Their match against The Revival at that NXT: Takeover last year was great. So why are they not great now? This was a tag-team turmoil match. Meaning two teams started and the winner went on to face another team and so on. AA beat The Ascension at the end to keep their titles. This was average. **
NIKKI BELLA vs. NATALYA (13:40): A no-contest. Some nice brawling. They should have gave Nikki the win since she's in a big Wrestlemania match teaming with her real life boyfriend, John Cena, against The Miz and Maryse. I guess they wanted to continue this boring feud. *1/2
RANDY ORTON vs. LUKE HARPER (17:15): Harper broke free from The Wyatt Family again. Remember he did that a few year's ago? I guess the writer's are out of ideas. Or...out of good ideas. Why is Orton in the Wyatt family? Remember when Daniel Bryan joined the Wyatt family? That was pointless. I don't think they realize that joining or leaving that family isn't compelling. Do they think it's like when people joined or left the NWO and the Wolfpac? An entertaining shocker! Well it's not. It's just a lifeless, tired plot. And this match was a stale TV match. Yawn. *1/2
ALEXA BLISS vs. NAOMI (8:20): Bliss is hot. End positive attributes. I mean...she can't wrestle. And wasn't Naomi a back-up dancer to that fat wrestler when she started? I totally forget his name but he's in TNA now. Well Naomi is the champ now. Did I mention Will Ospreay's performance against Shibata yesterday? Why am I not reviewing that show? 1/2*
BRAY WYATT vs. JOHN CENA vs. AJ STYLES vs. THE MIZ vs. DEAN AMBROSE vs. BARON CORBIN "ELIMINATION CHAMBER" (34:20) So Wyatt is finally champion. Took long enough. Although I'm not complaining. The only good match he's ever been in was that Royal Rumble match against Daniel Bryan two year's ago. Right? Wyatt is not known for good matches. He's not bad, he's just fat and slow and not that exciting. His cult-leader gimmick is his saving grace. And he pinned AJ Styles to win here. Cena lost the title he had just won two week's ago. The chamber was new. They made it higher so the wrestler's can stand and fight on top of the pods. Also the chain floor on the sides was replaced with boards. This was a good match but nothing special. If you want something special, go watch the last fifteen minutes of that Naito/Elgin match.
**1/2
Tuesday, January 31, 2017
WWE ROYAL RUMBLE
from San Antonio, TX
BECKY LYNCH, NIKKI BELLA & NAOMI vs. ALEXA BLISS, MICKIE JAMES & NATALYA (9:35): This was forgettable fluff. 1/2*
LUKE GALLOWS & KARL ANDERSON vs. SHEAMUS & CESARO (10:29): The sleep-inducing tag team won the titles here. Gallows and Anderson have been in the WWE for an entire year now and have they done anything remotely entertaining? Just make them AJ's bodyguards and be done with it. And Cesaro should be in main event title matches. Just a tragedy. *
NIA JAX vs. SASHA BANKS (5:10): The last of the pre-show matches (the pre-show started at 5 PM and the whole show ended about 10:40 PM). This was mostly a squash. Jax is so boring. I long for the days of Awesome Kong. Remember those Kong vs. Gail Kim matches? Memories. 1/2*
CHARLOTTE vs. BAYLEY (13:05): Good match. It's a shame that there's other women in the two women's divisions, as I'd be happy to just see Charlotte and Bayley and Sasha fight each other on every ppv until the end of time. Charlotte retained her title, which means her undefeated ppv streak rolls on. ***
KEVIN OWENS vs. ROMAN REIGNS "NO DQ MATCH" (22:55): What is the difference between a No DQ match and a Hardcore match? Nothing, apparently. Tables and chairs were used (Owens did a top-rope Frog Splash onto Reigns on a ringside table) and Jericho was suspended high above the ring in a shark cage (he still threw down a pair of brass knuckles to Owens). Braun Strowman came out at the end to slam Reigns onto the announce table then put him through a table in the ring, leading to Owens retaining the Universal title. Good match. And both title matches on this show were very good, which at least means the top of the cards are working these days. ***
NEVILLE vs. RICH SWANN (14:00): Kind of dull...sort of like the entire cruiserweight division and show, 205Live (which I guess refers to their weight? 205 lbs? You'd think they'd explain that). Neville, who's definitely on steroids, won the title. *1/2
JOHN CENA vs. AJ STYLES (24:10): Good match. The last ten minutes of this were awesome, albeit I'm a little tired of people kicking out of finishers. When someone kicks out of Okada's Rainmaker in NJPW it's like the fucking apocalypse occurred. When Cena kicked out of AJ's Styles Clash I just groaned. Cena won the title here. He tried some new moves, and Styles delivered the kitchen sink. Cena is a tad slower these days and this wasn't as good as their Summerslam match, but it was still quite the dramatic epic. ***
THE ROYAL RUMBLE (RANDY ORTON) (1:02:06): Not the best Rumble, especially considering it was a big one because it had Brock Lesnar, Goldberg, and The Undertaker in it (and this show was at the 50,000 seat Alamo Dome). When the last of the big names entered at #29 (Goldberg, who swiftly speared and clotheslined Lesnar out of the ring), I wondered; would #30 be a big surprise? Like...Shawn Michaels, since he was on the pre-show, he's from Texas, and his rival, The Undertaker, was still in the ring? Or maybe Kenny Omega? Finn Balor? Samoa Joe? Nakamura? Of course not. There were no surprise entrants. #30 was Roman Reigns, who got booed, and was there to be eliminated by the winner, Orton, so that Orton would get cheered (as extra boo incentive, Reigns eliminated The Undertaker). The match was entertaining but had it's problems. Orton is a star, but hasn't been booked as a star in years (he's currently in the Wyatt family for no good reason). Does anyone on Earth want to see Orton in the main event of Wrestlemania? The other problem was that The Undertaker is too old. He can barely walk or stand. Lesnar was awesome as usual, but since Goldberg beat him in a minute and a half at Survivor Series and then eliminated him in twenty seconds here...what the hell's the point of another match with them at Wrestlemania? The only psuedo-surprise entrants were The Big Show, Tye Dillinger from NXT, and Mark Henry. There was some amusing comedy with James Ellsworth, who got destroyed of course, and Jack Gallagher, a cruiserweight, English fop, who came out and hit everyone with an umbrella. I love the Rumble match, and even when it doesn't entirely work it's still a lot of fun. This was mostly average. **1/2
Saturday, January 7, 2017
NJPW WRESTLE KINGDOM 11
Tokyo, Japan
MICHAEL ELGIN vs. BILLY GUNN vs. BONE SOLDIER vs. CHEESEBURGER vs. HIRO SAITO vs. HIROYOSHI TENZAN vs. JUSHIN THUNDER LIGER vs. KUKIAKI KOBAYASHI vs.s MANABU NAKANISHI vs. RYUSUKE TAGUCHI vs. SCOTT NORTON vs. TIGER MASK vs. YOSHITATSU vs. YUJI NAGATA (25:13): This was the pre-show, psuedo-Royal Rumble match. You can pin opponents as well as throw them over the top rope. Elgin returned from his orbital bone surgery (the doctors apparently had to use a piece of his hip bone to fix his broken orbital bone, which is above the eye...weird!). He won in a fun, superfluous match. The tall, lanky black kid from ROH, Cheeseburger, was amusing and over with the crowd. **
TIGER MASK W vs. TIGER MASK DARK (6:34): Kind of racist, isn't it, calling ROH's black wrestler, ACH, dark? Well the other masked wrestler was Kota Ibushi. Which means we got a couple crazy top-rope leaps and some fun action. Ibushi wrestled last year in WWE's CWC tournament but turned down a NXT contract. Why? To apparently wrestle under a mask as an Anime character in the opener here. Maybe he should see a therapist. **1/2
RAPPONGI VICE vs. THE YOUNG BUCKS (12:57): This was good but not great. It was nice that they did a simple tag team match instead of the usual multi-team cluster fuck melee's. The problem was that those were more entertaining and wild. Perhaps the move of the entire night occurred when Baretta leaped over the top rope, flipped, and landed on his back on the mat on the floor when the Bucks moved out of the way. Jesus Christ, how is he not broken or dead? Rappongi Vice won the Jr. Tag titles here. ***
BUSHI, EVIL & SANADA vs. DAVID FINLAY, RICOCHET & SATOSHI KOJIMA vs. BAD LUCK FALE, HANGMAN PAGE & YUJIRO TAKAHASHI vs. WILL OSPREAY, JADO & YOSHI-HASHI (16:08): This was a gauntlet match...which meant Ospreay's team lost first and so we never got to see Ricochet and Ospreay wrestle together. Terrible booking. The Bullet Club team beat Ospreay's team then lost to Ricochet's team who then lost to Los Igobernables de Japon's team. This was for the 6-man tag titles, which Ricochet's team had, then LIG's team had, then they lost them to Tanahashi's team on New Year's Dash. What a stupid title. This was a good, fast, fun match, though. Ospreay and Ricochet were awesome as usual. ***
CODY vs. JUICE ROBINSON (9:37): Cody Rhodes was never any good in the WWE...and, sadly, he's not any good on the indie scene, either. He turned heel at ROH's Final Battle a few weeks ago and so now he's battling the young, dreadlocked lion, Juice Robinson. This was totally forgettable. 1/2*
ADAM COLE vs. KYLE O'REILLY (10:14): O'Reilly beat Cole at Final Battle to win the ROH title for the first time. He lost it fairly easily in ten minutes tonight. The reason was probably because O'Reilly decided not to sign a ROH contract. So Cole becomes the first ever ROH three-time champ. This match was so-so (there hardcore match at Final Battle was great) and the ending was, really, just a pin out of nowhere. Disappointing. *1/2
TOMOHIRO ISHII & TORU YANO vs. GUERRILLAS OF DESTINY vs. TOGI MAKABE & TOMOAKI HONMA (12:24): Good match. Honma and Makabe won the Tag Team tournament last month to get a shot at the Guerrilla's titles. So why were Ishii and Yano in this match? I guess New Japan came down with a case of WWE logic. That, or Yano and Ishii's opponents were supposed to be from NOAH but NOAH was sold and so NJPW wasn't a partner with them anymore. Kind of a letdown, as I would've loved to see NOAH'S Go Shiozaki and Marufuji on this show. Ishii and Yano won the tag titles here. **1/2
HIROMU TAKAHASHI vs. KUSHIDA (16:15): Good match. Takahashi was a little sloppy in spots, probably due to this being his first match here after a few years in CMLL. But Kushida looked as good as ever. Both guy's did a ton of suicidal spots and their next match will probably be even better. This was no Kamaitachi/Dragon Lee match (Takashi wrestled as Kamaitachi in CMLL and had some of the craziest matches you'll ever see in your life against Dragon Lee there), but it was the best match of the show so far and just the beginning of the murderer's row of incredible matches to come. Kushida retained the Jr. title here and Dragon Lee came out the next night at New Year's Dash to beat up Takahashi. ***
HIROKI GOTO vs. KENSUYORI SHIBATA (16:17): When this was over, I think everybody figured that this would be the match of the night. I'm not the biggest fan of Goto. He's usually good not great and rarely if ever in any phenomenal matches. But these two work well together and this was fucking brutal as hell. Shibata is so good and has been for so long that he really should be the champ and in the main events of these big shows. This was just back and forth hard kicks and elbows and near-falls and it was awesome. Goto won the NEVER title here. ***1/2
TETSUYA NAITO vs. HIROSHI TANAHASHI (25:25): Tanahashsi is kind of in the same spot that John Cena is in. He's still the big star, still the crowd favorite, but he's older, a tad slower, yet he can still pull of one hell of a great match. Tanahashi was a bit slow here early but the last five minutes when he was doing two Frog Splashes in a row and there were near-fall's and high drama it was just breathtaking. The end of this match was amazing. It wouldn't be topped. It couldn't be topped. ***1/2
KENNY OMEGA vs. KAZUCHIKA OKADA (46:45): It was topped. And I don't think I've ever seen a show with a final four match set as good as this one. They just got better and better until this; a 47 minute epic that had everything you ever wanted, hoped, or dreamed of. It was so long that early on they started slow and I was thinking that, you know, maybe these two just didn't have it tonight. They couldn't possibly put on a great match after those last two. But this match achieved a level of intensity and drama very rarely glimpsed in wrestling or any sporting event. There was Omega's moonsault off the top rope over the guardrail onto Okada in front of the announce table. There was Omega's top rope Dragon suplex on Okada that had Okada landing on his head. There was Okada flipping Omega up and over the top rope down through a table at ringside. There was Omega kicking out of a Rainmaker (which, granted, probably would have been more dramatic if Naito hadn't done the same last June). The final ten minute or so flurry of counters and near-falls and brutal knees and reversals was a sight to behold. This was pro-wrestling at it's apex. So much so that Dave Meltzer gave this match 6 stars on a usual 1-5 scale and some proclaimed it the greatest match they had ever seen. Was it? Probably not, as it was a bit too long and started slow. But by the end it had truly achieved greatness. This was an instant classic and one we're all going to be talking about for a long time to come. ***1/2
MICHAEL ELGIN vs. BILLY GUNN vs. BONE SOLDIER vs. CHEESEBURGER vs. HIRO SAITO vs. HIROYOSHI TENZAN vs. JUSHIN THUNDER LIGER vs. KUKIAKI KOBAYASHI vs.s MANABU NAKANISHI vs. RYUSUKE TAGUCHI vs. SCOTT NORTON vs. TIGER MASK vs. YOSHITATSU vs. YUJI NAGATA (25:13): This was the pre-show, psuedo-Royal Rumble match. You can pin opponents as well as throw them over the top rope. Elgin returned from his orbital bone surgery (the doctors apparently had to use a piece of his hip bone to fix his broken orbital bone, which is above the eye...weird!). He won in a fun, superfluous match. The tall, lanky black kid from ROH, Cheeseburger, was amusing and over with the crowd. **
TIGER MASK W vs. TIGER MASK DARK (6:34): Kind of racist, isn't it, calling ROH's black wrestler, ACH, dark? Well the other masked wrestler was Kota Ibushi. Which means we got a couple crazy top-rope leaps and some fun action. Ibushi wrestled last year in WWE's CWC tournament but turned down a NXT contract. Why? To apparently wrestle under a mask as an Anime character in the opener here. Maybe he should see a therapist. **1/2
RAPPONGI VICE vs. THE YOUNG BUCKS (12:57): This was good but not great. It was nice that they did a simple tag team match instead of the usual multi-team cluster fuck melee's. The problem was that those were more entertaining and wild. Perhaps the move of the entire night occurred when Baretta leaped over the top rope, flipped, and landed on his back on the mat on the floor when the Bucks moved out of the way. Jesus Christ, how is he not broken or dead? Rappongi Vice won the Jr. Tag titles here. ***
BUSHI, EVIL & SANADA vs. DAVID FINLAY, RICOCHET & SATOSHI KOJIMA vs. BAD LUCK FALE, HANGMAN PAGE & YUJIRO TAKAHASHI vs. WILL OSPREAY, JADO & YOSHI-HASHI (16:08): This was a gauntlet match...which meant Ospreay's team lost first and so we never got to see Ricochet and Ospreay wrestle together. Terrible booking. The Bullet Club team beat Ospreay's team then lost to Ricochet's team who then lost to Los Igobernables de Japon's team. This was for the 6-man tag titles, which Ricochet's team had, then LIG's team had, then they lost them to Tanahashi's team on New Year's Dash. What a stupid title. This was a good, fast, fun match, though. Ospreay and Ricochet were awesome as usual. ***
CODY vs. JUICE ROBINSON (9:37): Cody Rhodes was never any good in the WWE...and, sadly, he's not any good on the indie scene, either. He turned heel at ROH's Final Battle a few weeks ago and so now he's battling the young, dreadlocked lion, Juice Robinson. This was totally forgettable. 1/2*
ADAM COLE vs. KYLE O'REILLY (10:14): O'Reilly beat Cole at Final Battle to win the ROH title for the first time. He lost it fairly easily in ten minutes tonight. The reason was probably because O'Reilly decided not to sign a ROH contract. So Cole becomes the first ever ROH three-time champ. This match was so-so (there hardcore match at Final Battle was great) and the ending was, really, just a pin out of nowhere. Disappointing. *1/2
TOMOHIRO ISHII & TORU YANO vs. GUERRILLAS OF DESTINY vs. TOGI MAKABE & TOMOAKI HONMA (12:24): Good match. Honma and Makabe won the Tag Team tournament last month to get a shot at the Guerrilla's titles. So why were Ishii and Yano in this match? I guess New Japan came down with a case of WWE logic. That, or Yano and Ishii's opponents were supposed to be from NOAH but NOAH was sold and so NJPW wasn't a partner with them anymore. Kind of a letdown, as I would've loved to see NOAH'S Go Shiozaki and Marufuji on this show. Ishii and Yano won the tag titles here. **1/2
HIROMU TAKAHASHI vs. KUSHIDA (16:15): Good match. Takahashi was a little sloppy in spots, probably due to this being his first match here after a few years in CMLL. But Kushida looked as good as ever. Both guy's did a ton of suicidal spots and their next match will probably be even better. This was no Kamaitachi/Dragon Lee match (Takashi wrestled as Kamaitachi in CMLL and had some of the craziest matches you'll ever see in your life against Dragon Lee there), but it was the best match of the show so far and just the beginning of the murderer's row of incredible matches to come. Kushida retained the Jr. title here and Dragon Lee came out the next night at New Year's Dash to beat up Takahashi. ***
HIROKI GOTO vs. KENSUYORI SHIBATA (16:17): When this was over, I think everybody figured that this would be the match of the night. I'm not the biggest fan of Goto. He's usually good not great and rarely if ever in any phenomenal matches. But these two work well together and this was fucking brutal as hell. Shibata is so good and has been for so long that he really should be the champ and in the main events of these big shows. This was just back and forth hard kicks and elbows and near-falls and it was awesome. Goto won the NEVER title here. ***1/2
TETSUYA NAITO vs. HIROSHI TANAHASHI (25:25): Tanahashsi is kind of in the same spot that John Cena is in. He's still the big star, still the crowd favorite, but he's older, a tad slower, yet he can still pull of one hell of a great match. Tanahashi was a bit slow here early but the last five minutes when he was doing two Frog Splashes in a row and there were near-fall's and high drama it was just breathtaking. The end of this match was amazing. It wouldn't be topped. It couldn't be topped. ***1/2
KENNY OMEGA vs. KAZUCHIKA OKADA (46:45): It was topped. And I don't think I've ever seen a show with a final four match set as good as this one. They just got better and better until this; a 47 minute epic that had everything you ever wanted, hoped, or dreamed of. It was so long that early on they started slow and I was thinking that, you know, maybe these two just didn't have it tonight. They couldn't possibly put on a great match after those last two. But this match achieved a level of intensity and drama very rarely glimpsed in wrestling or any sporting event. There was Omega's moonsault off the top rope over the guardrail onto Okada in front of the announce table. There was Omega's top rope Dragon suplex on Okada that had Okada landing on his head. There was Okada flipping Omega up and over the top rope down through a table at ringside. There was Omega kicking out of a Rainmaker (which, granted, probably would have been more dramatic if Naito hadn't done the same last June). The final ten minute or so flurry of counters and near-falls and brutal knees and reversals was a sight to behold. This was pro-wrestling at it's apex. So much so that Dave Meltzer gave this match 6 stars on a usual 1-5 scale and some proclaimed it the greatest match they had ever seen. Was it? Probably not, as it was a bit too long and started slow. But by the end it had truly achieved greatness. This was an instant classic and one we're all going to be talking about for a long time to come. ***1/2
Tuesday, January 3, 2017
Best Show of 2016: NJPW WRESTLE KINGDOM 10
New Japan didn't even have it's best year ever but it still cleaned up all of the Best of the Year awards. Granted, I didn't watch every single show from every company in full (like the PWG, NOAH, or countless other shows). But the best show I did watch all year was Wrestle Kingdom 10 on January 4th from the Tokyo Dome. Wrestle Kingdom is basically NJPW's Wrestlemania. It usually ends up being the best show of the year or at least one of them. I didn't even think the Tanahashi/Okada main event was that great (it was merely good), but others thought it was a masterpiece. The show did have three 3.5 star matches (Kushida/Omega, The Young Bucks vs. reDragon vs. Rappongi Vice vs. Ricochet & Matt Sydal, Nakamura/Styles), which is rare. The Ishii/Shiibata match was a brutal, 3 star match. The Naito/Goto match was the lowest rated at 2 stars. The rest were 2.5 star matches (I didn't rate the superfluous, pre-show Rumble match). All together it was an excellent, 5+ hour show. Just a fantastic night of wrestling.
Monday, January 2, 2017
Best Wrestler of 2016: KENNY OMEGA
In 2015 I watched Omega a bunch of times and thought he was good but over-acted. So what happened in 2016? How did he narrowly beat AJ Styles for the Best Wrestler of the year crown? It's simple: he was in the best match of the year, two other matches in the top 10, and one that just barely missed the top 10 (the 6-man tag from NJPW's Power Struggle). At the beginning of the year, New Japan gave him the ball and he rolled with it. Styles and Nakamura went to the WWE and so they pushed Omega. He won the IC title and the G1 Climax tournament, he beat Naito and Tanahashi, and he became the leader of The Bullet Club. Yes, he over-acts, but that's his character; he's brash, arrogant, a punk. He does the amazing high-flying stuff, the hardcore ladder, tables, and chairs stuff, and the brutal, dramatic Japan-style stiff wrestling stuff. Omega is the whole package, and 2016 was the year he became a star.
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