DREW GULAK vs. AKIRA TOZAWA vs. TONY NESE (11:20): This was the only match on the card I thought would be any good and it turned out to be the best match of the night. A better company would have Tozawa vs. Ricochet in the main event for the title. The WWE is sadly not that company. Gulak ended up winning the 205Live title that Nese had. This was all action and the hot crowd made this even better. There were two particular head bumps that made me wonder if Nese had been watching Naito/Ibushi matches recently. Not a good thing! So Gulak is now the champ of a show nobody watches or cares about. Kind of sad that the best match of the show featured wrestlers relegated to the purgatory of 205Live. ***
BECKY LYNCH vs. LACEY EVANS (11:30): Evans was amusing in the main event later on as the heel referee. Maybe they should just make her Corbin's manager or something, because she can do everything but wrestle. She's a pretty blonde so of course they gave her a push...but this match was a complete bore and Evans just seems flustered and lost amidst the wrestling moves. Charlotte Flair wasn't even on this show. I'd be happy if Lynch faced Charlotte on every PPV until the end of time to be honest. 1/2*
KEVIN OWENS & SAMI ZAYN vs. THE NEW DAY (11:05): Good match. Zayn and Owens together are two of the only watchable things on RAW these days. It probably helps that they can both actually wrestle in entertaining matches. The crowd was hot for this (later on they died and started chanting various, random things) and Xavier Woods and Big E. are usually always in fast-paced, fun matches. This was bell to bell non-stop action. ***
RICOCHET vs. SAMOA JOE (12:25): If these two had wrestled four years ago in PWG it might have been the greatest match ever. Hell, if these two wrestled in another company today it would have been better. It was a good match but never turned into anything great. Ricochet, for whatever reason, just seems like a shell of his former self. He still does most of his flips and leaps and jumps and dives but for whatever reason it doesn't connect in the way that Will Ospreay's arsenal of maneuvers does. If you remember that infamous Ospreay/Ricochet match from a few years ago...they were pretty much on par with each other, yet now Ospreay is the best wrestler in the world and Ricochet is perhaps a little better than okay. He did usually excel in multi-man tag matches in New Japan, so maybe he was just never cut out for single matches. Or maybe Joe is just too old these days. The first half was a beat-down bore, then the second half was fairly dramatic. Ricochet won the U.S. title and looked like he just won the lottery. It's not that great of a title, kid. **1/2
DANIEL BRYAN & ROWAN vs. HEAVY MACHINERY (14:25): Good match, thanks mostly to the loud and proud Washington crowd. Bryan was born in Aberdeen, Washington so of course they showered him with approval and cheers and booed the good guys. They even cheered for Rowan. Heavy Machinery are pretty much two fat/fun guys. This wasn't exactly anything special, fresh, or new. But it was watchable. **1/2
BAYLEY vs. ALEXA BLISS (10:35): And here is where the show, which was pretty good up to this point, fell off a cliff. This was perhaps the worst match ever. Well, not really, but it was still awful. Bliss has never been and never will be in a good match ever. Bayley should just go back to NXT and wrestle Sasha Banks, because that's the last time she was ever relevant. This was for the Women's Title, which Bayley retained. This was simply the definition of boring. -No Stars-
ROMAN REIGNS vs. DREW McINTYRE (17:20): This match was also awful...until the last few minutes. The end was somewhat exciting with some near-falls and Shane giving Reigns the coast-to-coast dropkick when the ref was knocked out. These two are just both so fucking dull, lifeless, and mediocre. *
KOFI KINGSTON vs. DOLPH ZIGGLER "STEEL CAGE MATCH" (20:00): I'm really not sure what match was worse, this or the Bayley/Bliss one. This match was so God-awful boring. Ziggler showed up out of nowhere last month to wrestle Kofi for the title in Saudi Arabia after being gone for seemingly years. Now they're in a steel cage match that put everyone in the Tacoma Dome to sleep. Yes, Kofi had a great match at 'Mania against Bryan. Perhaps that was a fluke, because he definitely doesn't have the chops to put on great, main event matches. Nobody did anything suicidal off the cage. The finish had Dolph crawling out of the door but Kofi leaped through the ropes over him and landed on the floor to retain his title. Groan. 1/2*
SETH ROLLINS vs. BARON CORBIN (18:25): You know this PPV had zero interest when this main event was announced. Everyone hates Corbin except Vince. They've pushed Corbin to the fucking moon for some reason. I'm almost kind of shocked he didn't win the title (they have to save their Lesnar/Rollins Summerslam main event, I suppose). The hatred for Corbin isn't the usual heel heat, though. People don't hate him because he's a bad guy and he mocks the crowd. No, they hate him because he's an awful wrestler and he sucks and why are they pushing him? It's mind boggling. They did save this match from being a dumpster fire by having Corbin pick Lacey Evans to be the special referee. Which meant we got all of the hilarious, heel ref shenanigans. Slow counts and non-counts. Lacey changed the match to a "No Count Out" match when Baron couldn't make the ten count after being put through the announce table. Then Lacey made the match a "No DQ" match when Corbin started beating Seth with a steel chair. Yes, all of that heel ref schtick has been done a million times before but I still found it to be amusing and entertaining. It sure made this match a hell of a lot better than it had any right to be. The crowd chanted, "AEW," "Daniel Bryan," and "boring" during this match, although they got into it by the half way mark and popped big when Becky Lynch finally came out to beat up Lacey (Seth Rollins and Becky Lynch are dating in real life...which the announcers have been telling us constantly for the last few weeks). I was entertained by the second half of this match. Which, for the WWE these days, is a complete and utter shock. "Wait...you were entertained?" I can't believe it either. **1/2
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