Friday, December 15, 2017

ROH FINAL BATTLE

New York City

MATT TAVEN vs. WILL OSPREAY (10:58): Good opener. Both guys did a bunch of crazy, top-rope dives. Taven, though, looked super sloppy in everything he did next to the master, Ospreay, though. Which just shows how great (and smooth) Ospreay is. ***

WAR MACHINE vs. THE ADDICTION (9:35): Kind of a squash, really. The crowd was super hot for everything early but got a little more tired and quiet as the night wore on. They did go ape shit for the fat men of War Machine when they did their big moves. This was average. **

JAY LETHAL vs. MARTY SCURLL (15:55): Good match. 2017 is definitely the year that Scurll became a star. Lethal's been a little boring lately but these two worked well together. Scurll is always a lot of fun to watch. It worked. ***

THE MOTOR CITY MACHINE GUNS vs. BEST FRIENDS (10:20): The MCMG's retained the tag team titles in a good match that ended a little abruptly in a fast, roll-up pin. Chucky T. and Baretta, the Best Friends, were just in New Japan for their Tag tournament and were probably the most entertaining team in it.
This match was short and fast and fun while it lasted. **1/2

SILAS YOUNG vs. KENNY KING vs. PUNISHMENT MARTINEZ vs. SHANE TAYLOR (17:25): Young won the TV title in this elimination bout. Young is the "last real man." I guess he voted for Donald Trump? Martinez came out in a coffin surrounded by zombies. This match was just okay. Young broke a beer bottle over King's head. Martinez did a bunch of over the top rope dives. Taylor apparently lost 100 pounds but still has an ass the size of an elephant. It was entertaining in spots. **

THE BRISCOE'S vs. BULLY RAY & TOMMY DREAMER "NEW YORK CITY STREET FIGHT" (16:30): Jesus. Dudley and Dreamer are still wrestling? And still using tables and canes and bleeding? This was supposedly Bully Ray's last match. The crowd fucking loved it...they probably cheered more for this than anything else on the show...which probably tells you something about why our society is so violent...or not, who knows? It certainly wasn't boring. They used lightsaber's (the new Star Wars came out the day this show was on), a cheese grater, a ladder, chairs, tables, etc. Bully fake bled. It was amusing. **1/2

THE YOUNG BUCKS & ADAM PAGE vs. DRAGON LEE, TITAN & FLIP GORDON (15:11): Pure spectacle, as expected. There wasn't really anything new here, just the usual schtick and high flying. Gordon is really one to watch. And Dragon Lee and The Bucks are three of the most entertaining wrestlers in the world. It never reached the nirvana stage that some Bucks matches hit, but it was still awesome. ***

DALTON CASTLE vs. CODY RHODES (12:55): Rhodes came out with blonde hair. He lost the title. I guess that's kind of a surprise since Rhodes was supposed to defend his title against Ibushi at the Dome in a few weeks. The problem is that Rhodes is a good heel but he's never in good matches. Castle has a great gimmick with his island boys but in the ring he's pedestrian. Rhodes bled, put Castle through the announce table. There was a ref bump. Rhodes' wife did a top rope jump onto the boys. Other than those highlights, this was mostly lackluster. *1/2


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