Wow. WWE's first ever Fastlane ppv. Hopefully it'll be the last. A bad, meaningless title. I miss the Elimination Chamber. And this show was on at the exact same time as the Oscar's. I guess they figure dumb wrestling fans don't watch the Oscar's. Either way, what I did was watch the first match live at 8 (the Oscar's, which turned out dreadfully dull, didn't start until 8:30). Then I watched the rest of the show Monday night (and of course I watched the main event first on Monday...it was the only match anyone cared about). It's 16 degrees right now. That has no correlation on anything...except perhaps an Inferno match would've spiced up this show...a bit?
SETH ROLLINS & KANE & THE BIG SHOW vs. DOLPH ZIGGLER & ERICK ROWAN & RYBACK (13:01): Kind of just a same-old TV caliber match...except Orton returned post-match to chase Rollins out of the building. *1/2 (out of ****)
GOLDUST vs. STARDUST (8:55): The ref didn't even touch his hand to the mat for the "3" but it ended anyway. A botch? I'm not complaining...this match wasn't going anywhere. The crowd was lifeless for this, too, which didn't help. *1/2
THE USO'S vs. CESARO & TYSON KIDD (9:33): Cesaro has really been fucked over, eh? Remember when he was slowly becoming a big singles star? Jeez. I thought this would be better, as The Uso's at least usually entertain. It was just okay. And Cesaro just looks like he doesn't want to be there. *1/2
HHH & STING: A confrontation! And some fake punching and a Scorpion Death Drop. Sting is too old to still be wrestling. Someone tell him.
NIKKI BELLA vs. PAIGE (5:34): Paige is so gorgeous I'd rather just see her stand in the ring. This was another atrocious "Diva's" match. Why the WWE can't figure out how to make women's wrestling exciting outside of NXT is beyond me. 1/2*
BAD NEWS BARRETT vs. DEAN AMBROSE (7:58): Ambrose reminds of of vintage The Sandman. He's wild, loose, crazy. Sadly, he's stuck fighting boring Barrett. The end was a DQ because Ambrose kept punching Barrett in the corner. Huh? *1/2
BRAY WYATT: The Undertaker's robed figures with torches came out with a casket but Bray Wyatt was in it. Okay...
RUSEV vs. JOHN CENA (18:42): Good match. Rusev kicked Cena in the balls when the ref wasn't looking and it helped him win (Rusev is undefeated). What was good on this whole show was the matches were back and forth instead of the usual WWE protocol of having a beat down followed by a miraculous recovery. **1/2
ROMAN REIGNS vs. DANIEL BRYAN (20:10): Good match. Definitely Reigns' best singles match thus far. He still isn't there yet. Will he ever be? Bryan is on another level. He looked as good as he's ever looked. The crowd didn't boo Reigns as much but they still cheered more for Bryan. A Lesnar/Bryan match would be a masterpiece. I just hope we see it someday. The finish had Bryan ready to deliver his flying knee when Reigns speared him for the clean finish. **1/2
So Wrestlemania has:
Sting vs. HHH
Wyatt vs. Undertaker
Daniel Bryan vs. Dolph Ziggler
Reigns vs. Lesnar
Orton vs. Rollins
Not a bad card, but not as good as it could be. Ziggler and Bryan should steal the show...albeit the match is meaningless. The Undertaker and Sting are too old to be wrestling so those matches won't work. Reigns/Lesnar will be obviously mediocre. And Orton/Rollins has dull written all over it.
I guess we'll see. Please surprise me.
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