Monday, August 22, 2016

WWE SUMMERSLAM

from Brooklyn

AMERICAN ALPHA & THE HYPE BROTHERS & THE USO'S vs. BREEZANGO & THE ASCENSION & THE VAUDEVILLAINS (14:32): This show was way too long! It started at 5 PM and ended at 11:05 PM. Granted, the first three matches were amidst the two-hour pre-show, but still. And it was already a hell of a weekend and month for MMA and wrestling. Last weekend, NJPW finished off their 19-show G1 tournament (and while it wasn't the best G1, Ishii/Okada, Naito/Omega, and Tanahashi/Okada were all match-of-the-year contenders). ROH had a ppv on Friday (Adam Cole won the title). EVOLVE had two shows with Cody Rhodes debuting. NXT Takeover Brooklyn II went down on Saturday night (Nakamura won the title). UFC had their biggest fight of the year on Saturday when Conor McGregor won his re-match against a bloody Nick Diaz. And NJPW had the finals of their Super-J Cup on Sunday morning (Kushida won). Exhale. Time to go outside and communicate with nature now. Or, at least, not watch the WWE pre-show matches. This was simple, same-old. American Alpha are exciting. *1/2

SAMI ZAYN & NEVILLE vs. THE DUDLEY BOYZ (7:55): The Dudley Boyz retired on the Monday Night RAW after Summerslam. What a last match! Seriously, Sami Zayn and Neville deserve better. *1/2


SHEAMUS vs. CESARO (14:10): A fan held up a sign at ringside that read "Cesaro Deserves Better." This was the first match in a Best of 7 series between these two. The only reason? To punish us fans, apparently. The winner doesn't even get anything. It was average stuff. **

CHRIS JERICHO & KEVIN OWENS vs. ENZO AMORE & BIG CASS (12:08): They seemed to waste a lot of big names in these early, lame matches. Sami Zayn vs. Cesaro could have been a better Summerslam main event. And Owens, one of the true heel stars, should have been in one of the numerous title matches. But no, they've teamed him up with Jericho because...they're both from Canada? Jericho and Owens are hilarious on the mic...but this was a RAW match, not a ppv match. I will say that Enzo and Big Cass are perhaps the hottest team to come out of NXT right out of the gate. Usually it takes time for fans to get familiar with the new NXT call-ups or "get" them or learn to like them or whatever, but Enzo and Cass were fan favorites right away. Unfortunately, they're not the greatest in the ring. Which meant that this match was mediocre. ** 


CHARLOTTE vs. SASHA BANKS (13:55): Good match. Probably not as good as the match last month on RAW when Sasha won the title from Charlotte, but super-entertaining nonetheless. Sasha really takes a beating, doesn't she? Maybe she needs to take lessons on how to take a bump properly or something. It sure makes her matches exciting, though, like her hurricanrana out of a Razor's Edge off the top rope on Charlotte. The ending was unique, too. Sasha had her submission finisher locked on and Charlotte rolled back onto Sasha and pinned her. Definitely a surprise, as Sasha hasn't had the title long. ***


THE MIZ vs. APOLLO CREWS (5:45): Ugh. Why? 1/2*

AJ STYLES vs. JOHN CENA (23:10): Spectacular. This was much better than the first match in June at Money in the Bank. It wasn't as good as Roman Reigns vs. AJ Styles II nor the first two Kevin Owens/John Cena matches from last year. It was very similar to the Owens/Cena matches, though, in that they brought out new moves and kept kicking out of everything. AJ won clean which was a big shock. I really hope we get to see an AJ/Lesnar title main event match someday. I can't be the only one dreaming of that, right? ***1/2

LUKE GALLOWS & KARL ANDERSON vs. THE NEW DAY (9:09): John Stewart, the former host of The Daily Show, showed up as The New Day's 3rd man (since Big E. was hurt). The crowd did not like or want to see Stewart (and in fairness, he's been retired from TV for a year so...maybe people forgot him?). But Stewart does a hilarious Three Stooges/Marx Brothers type of zany/physical comedy that I found more entertaining than this dull slog of a match. Gallows and Anderson were boring in New Japan...which is hard to to! So I didn't expect them to work here. Big E. came out at the end when Gallows and Anderson were about to slam Stewart's balls into the ring-post. So the match ended up being a DQ win for the bad guys. And it was nice to see Stewart because, boy, that new Daily Show host is awful. **

DEAN AMBROSE vs. DOLPH ZIGGLER (15:18): Ambrose got screwed. He finally won the title and then a month later they split the brand and now have two titles. And I guess giving Ziggler this shot is to appease the fans from three years ago who thought he should be pushed (he was, sort of, winning the title on a hot, post-Wrestlemania RAW and then getting injured). I doubt there are any Ziggler fans anymore. The crowd was a silent tomb during this match (and, to be honest, during most of this show...maybe because it was so long and maybe because AJ/Cena was the only match anyone wanted to see). Ambrose won. It wasn't terrible, just nothing exciting happened. They probably should have, like, pushed Ziggler and given this match a story line instead of it just happening all of a sudden. **

NATALYA & ALEXA BLISS & NIKKI BELLA vs. BECKY LYNCH, NAOMI & CARMELLA (11:07): Nikki Bella made her return (she was gone?) in too-short latex shorts. I guess these are the Smackdown women? Why they split the women's division is beyond me. Why they even did the split is beyond me. Now RAW is worse. And we're stuck watching 7 Smackdown and RAW ppv's that will obviously suck. Last time they did this it was a disaster. Ratings on both shows dropped. The Smackdown ppv's were horrendous. Remember, JBL had the frigging Smackdown title for like a year or something during the last split. My God we better not get a Baron Corbin year long title reign. And, back to this match...why isn't there a Smackdown women's title? Eh, who cares? 1/2*

SETH ROLLINS vs. FINN BALOR (19:24): Finn Balor won the RAW title clean. It's stupidly called the Universal Heavyweight title. The problem? Balor hurt his shoulder when Rollins power-bombed/threw him into the black crowd barrier wall at ringside. So Balor relinquished his title on RAW and next week there's a fatal four way for the title with Reigns, Owens, Rollins, and...Big Cass. Yep, I guess you know who they're pinning. Balor is out 4-6 months...so should be back for the Rumble. And Brett Hart was ranting on various web-sites how Rollins needs to change his style because he injures too many people (he broke Cena's nose last year and gave Sting a neck injury). Balor has been in some very good matches lately but this match was just so-so. I guess the two just didn't connect? The last few minutes were exciting, though, and I was shocked at the outcome. **1/2

ROMAN REIGNS vs. RUSEV: They beat each other up and the match never started. Reigns is turning into Cena. I don't like Reigns but I admit that he's been in some good, brutal matches. His second match with AJ this year was one of WWE's best of the year. And I don't like Cena but he usually pulls out good matches on the ppv's.


RANDY ORTON vs. BROCK LESNAR (11:45): Well...this happened. It was an okay match. Lesnar threw Orton at the Spanish announce table and it broke. Orton gave Lesnar an RKO on the announce table and it didn't break. They both kicked out of each other's finisher. The finale had Lesnar using his elbow to draw blood. This worked! Orton bled like a stuck pig from his head, the refs and docs came out, the ref called it a TKO win for Lesnar. Shane ran out and got F-5'd by Lesnar. Orton needed staples in his head. Weird, anti-climactic ending. The fans were bored, confused, and tired. I guess don't have this go on last if you're doing that finish? And, really, the plan was for Lesnar to elbow Orton until he got cut and bled for real? That's a plan? Orton was okay with that? Even Jericho apparently confronted Lesnar backstage post-match because he thought it was off-script. I think this all would have been better if this match had a story or a build beyond, "Hey, these two guys are wrestling for no reason at Summerslam." **