TNA SLAMMIVERSARY

Sunday, June 15th, 2014
Arlington, Texas

SEIYA SANADA vs. TIGRE UNO vs. MANIK vs. CRAZZY STEVE vs. EDDIE EDWARDS vs. DAVEY RICHARDS "LADDER MATCH": So there was a ladder match, a cage match, and a death match. I guess TNA can't get by on regular old wrestling, eh? I'm not complaining. This opener was a bit too short but definitely wild. One of the Wolves, Richards, got flipped off the top rope onto a ladder arranged atop the top rope and ladder. That was the brutal move of the night. Just a bunch of craziness, really. Sanada retains the X-Division title. He did do a moonsault onto someone laying atop a ladder. That was sick. ***

 SOMOA JOE vs. BOBBY LASHLEY: Not bad. Crowd was good tonight. The winner of this and the Aries/King match goes into the main event against champ Young. **

WILLOW vs. MAGNUS: Jeff Hardy is Willow. Willow is weird. That's the gimmick. He did do a backwards leap/Nestea plunge from the top rope onto Magnus and Bram which was pretty crazy actually. Other then that it was pretty lame. *1/2

AUSTIN ARIES vs. KENNY KING: Eh. Aries needs to go to the WWE yesterday. King is mediocre. *1/2

ROSS & MARSHALL VON ERICH vs. DJ ZEMA ION & JESSIE GODDERZ: I'm too young to remember the Von Erich's. But these are Kevin Von Erich's sons. Kevin did get in the ring late and the crowd went nuts. Fuck...I'm 34 and too young to remember these guys. Who the hell in that audience does? Not a particularly good match. Ion and Golderrz used a chair and lost by DQ. **

ANGELINA LOVE vs. GAIL KIM: I'll be honest: I didn't watch this.

BULLY RAY vs. ETHAN CARTER III "TEXAS DEATH MATCH": This was a "Last Man Standing Match." They just called it a TDM for no other reason then it was in Texas. They did use broken glass. Bully fell through two tables at ringside and lost. It was entertaining but mostly dumb. **

MR. ANDERSON vs. JAMES STORM: Not good. Storm spit beer at a few Dallas Cowboys at ringside and the one interfered in the ring and cost Storm to lose. Eh. *

ERIC YOUNG vs. BOBBY LASHLEY vs. AUSTIN ARIES "CAGE MATCH":  Young did an elbow drop off the top of the cage. He retained. A decent main event to a decent show. The problem? Young lost the title to Lashley on Impact four days after this show...so what was the point of him retaining here? **1/2

WWE PAYBACK

Sunday, June 1st
Chicago

I kind of feel bad for those in Chicago at this show because game seven of the Eastern Conference NHL finals between the Blackhawks and the Kings was on at the same time in Chicago (albeit, Payback is over and it's 11:11 PM and the game is still on and tied in OT). Thought most fake-sport fans probably don't watch real sports. Although every heel on this show mentioned how the Blackhawks would lose and a guy in the second row was dressed as a clown and wearing a Blackhawks jersey.

TORITO vs. HORNSWOGGLE "MASK vs. HAIR": Yes, you read that right. I'm wondering if this was WWE's first ever hair vs. mask match. Mexico does it every day practically. Not a good match but 3MB and Los Matadores got involved and everyone took turns jumping off the top rope onto a pile of men that fell over. And then the ridiculous shave. This was on the pre-show. *1/2

CESARO vs. SHEAMUS: And the Blackhawks did lose in OT. The heels were right. And this was a fairly good show, albeit with some lame undercard matches. This was not lame. A good, high-action, back and forth wrestling match. Finisher was bad (Cesaro gave Sheamus The Swing and then Sheamus rolled Cesaro up in a small package to win and keep his U.S. title). I still don't get how Cesaro is a heel...but he's had some good matches this year so far and I wouldn't be surprised if he's fighting for the real title later this year. **1/2

RYBACK & CURTIS AXEL vs. GOLDDUST & CODY RHODES: Not very good. Rhodes quit his team post-match. 1/2*

RUSEV vs. BIG E: Yeah, the undercard mostly blew. Big E did do his patented tackle through the ropes maneuver which is always cool. Del Rio, Swagger, and Dolph Ziggler didn't wrestle on this show. But Bo Dallas and Alicia Fox did. And no WWE title defense. So weird show. 1/2*

BAD NEWS BARRETT vs. RVD: Barrett is funny but a boring wrestler. RVD is old. This is what you get. 1/2*

DANIEL BRYAN, BRIE BELLA & STEPHANIE MCMAHON: So Bryan, who had neck surgery and is out for awhile, had to give up the title or his wife, Brie, would be fired. The Chicago crowd chanted, "CM Punk!" Stephanie said something about how the people want Bryan to quit like Punk did. Brie Bella said that she quit then called Stephanie a bitch and slapped her. Good segment. Bryan, if ready, will fight Kane in a stretcher match for the title on June 29th at MITB. Otherwise...a MITB match for the title. **1/2

JOHN CENA vs. BRAY WYATT "LAST MAN STANDING": Good match. Yes, Cena in a good match. Thank the tables and chairs and the Wyatt family and Uso's. Luke Harper gave one of the Uso's a suplex off the top rope through two tables. Cena threw the steel ring steps over the top rope at Bray on the floor. The finish had Bray pinned under a utility crate over by the pyrotechnic desk. He couldn't get up and lost. Wild stuff with a lame end. ***

PAIGE vs. ALICIA FOX: Paige is the hottest chick in wrestling in a long time. Sadly, she's not entertaining in the ring. 1/2*

THE SHIELD vs. EVOLUTION "NO HOLDS BARRED ELIMINATION MATCH": A good, long main event. They brawled everywhere. Seth Rollins lept off the lower half of the titan tron. They used Singapore canes and the ring steps. Reigns was put through the announce table. After thirty minutes finally all three members of Evolution were pinned and eliminated. Sweep. Good clusterfuck melee. Batista, who wore a ridiculous blue outfit, was pelted with "Bluetista" chants. He quit on RAW. The end of this feud I suppose. ***